The spirit of the bear walks with me. As I journey through this life, bears medicine walks with me. It gives me strength when I need it and reminds me that sometimes you need to rest so that once again you can grow and keep moving forward. Kinanâskomitin, I am grateful
I’ve been told about my family’s history and told I should remember it, so I do. This is how we start.
In the beginning… we were here, we were here from time immemorial, from before colonization, before Canada and before the treaties. We come from people who were autonomous and independent. We had our own creation story, our own history, our own math and science. We hand our own medicines and medical practices. We educated ourselves. We took care of ourselves. We knew our history, our laws, and practiced our culture freely. As time continued we experienced changes and made contact with new cultures and new ideas. We considered ourselves equal to these people. They did not consider us their equal and sought to exploit us.
We found the changes that were occurring were faster than we expected, and we were asked to enter into agreements to share the land. So we entered into ceremony, prayed, and asked for guidance towards this end. In 1876, we were guided and therefore agreed to enter into a sacred treaty. This was done to benefit the people. We thought that because we we had entered into an agreement through Sacred Ceremony, that they would honour the sacredness and truth of the treaty. We thought they would follow through on their word to help us.
We did not agree to give up our independence, nor did we agree to give up who we were, our laws, our traditions, and our ways of being. We did not think they would continue to steal from us, not only taking all the land we agreed to share but also eventually our children. We did not think we would lose our autonomy, nor did we think we would be forced to give up our culture, language, and traditions to fit into another nations society. Their society.
So our family history is always told with the prefaced context of what happens next. This is the story of our family and its journey to now. It’s about how history has impacted us as best as I can tell. It’s about our relatives and who we come from. It’s the story of us.
Today, I carried the love my children, my nosim, and husband have for me, it help me feel connected to all my reasons for healing.
Today, I carried my parents’ hope with me to remind me that I am always prayed for.
Today, I carried my brothers familys love for me, and it helped me to know it’s ok to feel sad because there are people there to pick me up.
Today, I carried my sisters with me when I went to chemo. I wore a ribbon skirt made by one. It brought the healing love that they freely give me. It reminded me to live life with ceremony, culture, and love.
Today, I carried with me my aunties and uncles prayers. These prayers and their love support all my family during difficult times.
Today, I carried with me my in-laws love and support for my family. I know they hold us close.
Today, I carried with me the love of my nieces and nephews. Their laughter and joy reminded me of life.
Today, I carried with me my friends comfort. This reminds me that I always have people to help me.
Today I brought ahkamēyimok with me. It is the feeling of perseverance, to not give up, and to keep going in spite of difficult times. I am grateful and blessed.
Kinanâskomitin
The lake it calls me home. Waves breaking softly upon its shore. The birds singing in the trees near by. The warmth of the sun in the sky. The lake it calls me home.
The lake it calls me home, feeling peaceful in silence I sit. Meditating on the waves as they hit the shore; sounds all around of the water as it sings. Life is what the lake brings. The lake it calls me home.
The lake it calls me home, peaceful upon its shore; the birds and the animals that it brings. The lake is calling me home. Sunlight glistening brings me close to the peace and hope. Quiet as the lake sings. The lake is calling me home.
I close my eyes and I feel the softness of the earth under my feet. My moccasins touching the soul of where my ancestors walked before me.
I breath in and listen to the quiet of the forest all around me. It’s quiet but noisy at the same time. I gear the birds and animals around me. I feel the peace and connection that my ancestors felt before me.
I open my eye and I see the beauty of this land. I see the clear water, I see the treas grown tall. I see the birds flying and the moose walking. I see the plants for healingand medicines and I know where I belong.
I feel the connection, so strong. I pray to my ancestors to ask Creator to help me and guide me. I pray that others see the beauty and blessing of our ancestors who walked this land. I pray so others may see their reflection and the beauty of the natural world.
Medicine has been gifted to people. Every culture has its own understandings of medicine and what that means. Medicine is learned, it is taught, it is lived. In Nehiyawak culture medicine can be plants, it can be ceremony, it can be spending time in nature or with others. The word medicine has many different meanings. In this way there are many different ways to seek healing. Medicine is what makes you better.
One summer several years ago we went camping at mile seven. My Aunt Alsena, my father’s first cousin, met us there. Our purpose in going there’s was to pick medicines, there are several different kinds in that area.
We had spent the afternoon picking medicines and auntie Alsena told us that her friend Diane was going to meet up with us. She had camped there with us before. When Dianne showed up she had brought sage and sweet grass with her.
We learned about creating sage bundles and sweetgrass braids. Once we finished making the braids and bundles we took them and hung them up to dry in the breeze off the lake.
Then we began to clean the roots and preparing the medicines. As we were cleaning the medicines, Dianne and auntie Alsena were telling stories of the medicines and how we got them. We learned how the medicinal plants were used and why we are so connected to the land. This connection itself is a form of medicine. Just being out on the land brings healing in various ways.
One of the medicines we learned about was spruce gum. This spruce gum is used as an antiseptic. It fights infection. It helps to hold skin together when someone is injured. It is used to treat colds and is added to other medicines. It can be used for food too.
We were told the story of the gift of spruce gum and how badger gave it to us. Badgers are fierce and dangerous animals. A long time ago they were very big, much larger than they are now. They were bigger than people, and they used to kill and hurt people. The people prayed to the Creator for help, because we are weak and we need help to survive. The Creator told badger to stop harming people. That did not happen. Eventually the Creator had to do something about badger. The people had chased two baby badgers up a tree. Creator told them that because badger had not respected the request to live peacefully they would be changed. They would no longer be bigger than the people, they would remain the size of their babies. They would provide help to the people through the warmth of their fur, etc. The baby badgers were grateful that the Creator allowed them to live and they promised to help the people. When they slid down the spruce tree their claws cut open the bark and the tree sap came out. The badgers told the people that this was their medicine that they were sharing it with the people as a way to make amends. They taught the people what its used for and how to use it. There are stories for all medicines. Storytelling helps you to remember the medicines and how and why they are used.
Auntie Alsena also told us about a man was lost in the bush for two weeks in the winter. His snowmobile ran out of gas and he tried to hike out of the bush. He got lost and ran out of food and water. To survive he ate spruce gum and drank melted snow to help sustain his body. He survived and was rescued. She told us all that spruce gum is full of vitamin c and will help us if we need it.
All of these activities were each a form of medicine. Each thing gave us something different to heal us. It balanced our spirits through the camping and story telling. It taught us ways to help ourselves in a crisis. We learned the medicinal properties and usage of plants. We laughed and found purpose in what we did. We built connections and created memories that will last a lifetime. All this is good medicine.
Sakaw Iskwew 